All of us want to feel important, loved, necessary. Nothing does that like 20+ years of parenting children! The distractions of the busy years keeps us from examining our own lives too closely. That daily dose of too busy, of being needed, boosts our self esteem and all too often becomes our identity. No children? Perhaps it's your career. Constantly connected, an irreplaceable part of the team, making things happen. Until you get layed off....
Now what? Who am I? How do I get the "high" of being needed? Am I even necessary anymore? All thoughts that have crossed my mind. Observing my friends it's fascinating watching the different solutions. Two of them divorced. Several of the women in my life simply continue on in the Mom role. Helicopter parenting, one has adopted children, others are reliving the car seat years through their grandkids. Others have become good samaritins, super active with their church, Humane Society or other worthwhile causes. One had plastic surgery. Many of them post their every move on Facebook, the latest place to receive the reassurance we all crave.
Society and the constant connection to media is exhausting. We're influenced to believe (and the scary part, we DO) that we need to be thin, wrinkle free, no gray hair, connected, hip and relevant to be worthwhile. Why? Maybe it's okay to let go of the outside stimulation and learn to appreciate ourselves. Enjoy our lives, do no harm, and uplift the world in small ways without expecting or needing the round of applause. Take the time to get to know yourself and what truly makes YOU happy, then give yourself permission to DO it.
Enjoy your freedom!